Friday, June 30, 2017

Today I am grateful for pedicures.  I would get a pedicure every week if they didn’t cost money!  I just love them.


I get very irritated when nail polish is chipped. Ask my granddaughters!  “Take it off or paint over it,” I tell them all the time.  Even on toes.  Well this morning I woke up and half of the polish was off my big toe.  Horrors!  I thought about painting it myself, at least to get through water aerobics, but I didn’t because I had to put a shoe on.  I hate schmootzed polish,too.


I haven’t searched the bed for the corpse of the bright pink chip, but it might have fallen off earlier and I just didn’t notice, though I doubt it.


I know there are some guys who paper themselves with manicures and pedicures, but I’ve never seen any when I was there.  They are missing the boat.  And I’m glad.  Because men are everywhere and I don’t want equal rights on this.  I don’t want “Ellen” to be replaced by “Sports Talk” on the salon TV.  I don’t want the girls around me to sensor their chatter because guys are there.  And I don’t want them to know that there is a massage chair that has better hands than they do and it doesn’t snore, burp, or fart on cue.


Go hit a little ball on a big green lawn, trying to get it in a sunken Dixie cup.  Scream over a piece of leather while guys crash into each other and run like hell through pic-up-stix.  Listen to the squeaky shoes of tall, skinny dudes trying to sink balls through big fishing nets.  Stay out of my nail salon.  I enjoy a pedicure much more without you.

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One Response to Pedicures

  1. Marie A. Bishop says:

    Wouldn’t it be interesting – would they talk about the supper they would prepare – the latest dish on the neighbors – who is seeing who(m?) – cranky wife – not getting ______?????? HA HA!!!

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