Saturday, December 12, 2015
Today I am grateful for getting smart. I’m in high prep right now for the huge brunch we’re having tomorrow for upwards of 40 people.
True fact. My house can’t hold 40-50 people comfortably. Another true fact. My kitchen is waaaaayyyy too small to cook comfortably for 40-50 people. One more fact. I don’t have seating for 40-50 people. But they’ll be here anyway, ravenous and thirsty at 11 a.m.. And they better be. . .because I’m making enough food for an army. My army of peeps.
The buffet table is up in the living room; the mimosa’s and bloody Mary’s and other sundry beverages will be set up in the laundry room. Desserts will go on our bed, but they won’t have to share with heavy coats this year because apparently I’m living in the Bahamas, with temps expected to hit 68.
I’ve gotten a little smarter through the years, so that’s good. I used to make a bazillion individual, bite size quiches and snicky-snacky, delicate little foods. Hah! The way they devoured them was not delicate at all, so now it’s all about volume-volume-volume! I hand off huge pans of Indonesian fried rice (nasi goring), through the kitchen pass-through, enlist the help of “runners” and we do a fireman’s bucket brigade method over heads for some stuff because there are just too many people to get through.
Guests have come to expect several of the traditional Indonesian dishes I make and they require slicing hot, red, chili peppers. The first time I did this I didn’t wear gloves and I thought my hands would burn off. The second I thought my lungs were the result of twelve-packs a day. The third I got splashed in the eye with an errant chili seed and was nearly blinded. I’m a little slow. I only cut these once a year so I forget the drill. I gear-up in my own generic version of a hazmat suit to chop those little yummy nasties.
There will be no room to move, too much food, too much libation, too many people, too much noise. Absolutely no one will complain because it will also be too much fun! I won’t have burnt hands, or lung disease, or chili-seed-blindness, because this year I’m getting smart!