Each time one pops onto my screen I swear I will not bite. . . and yet. . .how old will it say I look? If it’s older than I am I’m deleting it. . .from my screen and my mind! Maybe I need to know what color is best for me. That way I will have one more thing to be frustrated about when I shop and can’t find anything in that color anywhere.
How many state capitals can I name? (Not many.) Which song describes me? (You make me feel like dancing!) Which Disney character looks like me? (Goofy, except for the ears) Who looks the least like me? (Sophia Loren) Which famous person am I most like? (Kathy Bates?) Who is my opposite? (Donald Trump – bad hair and a worse attitude) How long should my hair be? (Short! And I don’t care what the quiz says.) How is my grammar? (Not too shabby, except for an overuse of . . . and exclamation points!. . .and absolutely no concept for correct apostrophes’.) What color should my car be? (Really? Do I have time for this nonsense?) Can you find the common spelling mistakes? (Sumtimes) What do the things I hate say about me? (What things I hate? I don’t hate much! The only things I hated on the entire list were Kim Kardashian (no one should have fame and fortune without actually earning it! And fruitcake, which can’t possibly be described as food on this planet!)
Then I got asked what “age” I should live in? (Medieval – Yeah, right! I’m longing to live during a time period without air conditioning, microwaves, indoor plumbing and toilet paper! ERRRRR-BUZZZZZ! You don’t KNOW me at ALL! ) Got that sucker wronger than wrong can be! Missed the boat, the train and almost the spelling of medieval!
That’s it! I’m done! No more. I have books to read and stories to write and places to go and people to see and way better nonsense than this to occupy my time. Wait? What? “Will you be wealthy?” What? Of course I’m already wealthy because I have friends. . . Blah-Blah-Boring! I’m not taking it. Go away. Wealthy? Do you mean REAL wealth? Like the wealth from actual cash dollars that give you an opportunity to go REAL places and do REALLY good things for other people? Oh crap! Now I gotta go take this stupid, mindless Facebook quiz. . .but this is the LAST one!