Laundromat Chronicles – First

Stuffed dryerMonday, October 20, 2014

Today I am grateful for the first of my Laundromat Chronicles.  I swear I could be entertained and find something interesting if you put me in a closed garbage can without a flashlight.

Yesterday I took sheets to the Laundromat. I meant to take a book, but it only takes a half-an-hour to wash a load and I bring it home to dry, so it wasn’t a big deal that I forgot.  You would think not much could happen in that short of a time.  Hah!  Do you KNOW me?  There were so many interesting characters that I can’t get them all in one blog post!  Here’s the first.

She’s young and skinny as a pencil and tall, with funky, black leather boots, rolled down at the top like Johnny Depp as a pirate, making her look taller. She has on skinny jeans that wouldn’t have fit on my arms, a blousy gray top and silver jewelry.  Lots of jewelry.  Her hair is clipped up loosely with a toothy clamp and tousling around her long thin face.  It would take some people hours to get this look, but I bet she just threw it up.  She looked great.  So why am I writing about this reasonably normal, good looking woman?

When you are done reading this go into your bedroom. Open the closet door.  If there are two doors, open both of them.  If you have a second closet open that, too.  Then go to your dressers and open ALL of the drawers.  If you have boxes under your bed with clothing in them, like I do, pull them out and open them, too.  That’s how much laundry this woman was doing.  She had more clothes than JC Penney’s, Macy’s, and Kohls combined!  And she jammed it all into two dryers.  I watched her.  I wanted to take a picture, but how do you say, “Excuse me, could I get a picture of the ridiculous amount of clothing you are stuffing into that dryer because I want to write about it so all of my friends will know how crazy Laundromat people can be?”

Not only did she jam, but half of it was twisted into knots when she did it.  She had a wheely-cart heaped with tangle, knotted, gnarly clothing, with sheets and towels and socks and bras and everything in one globby lump.  Watching her pick through it all was like witnessing Black Friday at Filene’s Basement!  She’d pull at something and it wouldn’t come out so she picked away at a few panties, a shirt, some socks, trying to unclench them.  Then she’d toss it into a 55 gallon dryer, until she had 380 gallons worth of clothing inside and turn it on.  If dryers had eyes, it’s were crossed!  It was fascinating.  It was crazy.  It was very entertaining.

I wasn’t there for the beginning or the finale of this little three-act (wash-dry-fold) show, but I sure am grateful I was there for the second act. Otherwise how could she be the first of my Laundromat Chronicles?

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